Sunday, April 22, 2007

The scourge of women (Or their allure?)

Babubhai Katara is a despicable man. Last week he was in the news for having been caught red-handed while trying to smuggle a lady abroad by passing her as his wife under a fake passport. What's funny is that he'd cleared the immigration and the customs check and both of them were merrily seated in the airplane with less than half an hour to go for the takeoff and that's when, that's exactly when his crookedly malicious fate decided to shake a leg. A fellow lady passenger aboard lost her passport.

The officials started pulling out all the documents and in a routine check asked Babubhai Katara's supposed wife what her name was and in a lyrical moment, she will rue every single day of her life, the lady blurted out her real name of Paramjeet, instead of the name she should've given, Sarada Ben, the name on the fake passport she’d used. Needless to say, with that swift stroke Babubhai Katara's political and personal life has come to naught. That he deserved it is beyond any doubt. But that the disaster could've been avoided if the woman hadn't been so idiotic is equally obvious.

Now at this point I want you to spare a thought for Babubhai. What wrong did he do in scheming it up? So perfectly planned. And the only thing beyond his control got him into the deepest shit ever for no fault of his. Come to think of it, it's not the first time that a man has got screwed because of a woman around him.

Since the very beginning, women have proved too tempting a presence for man to ignore and too devastating a force to survive alongside with. Think of Eve coaxing Adam to go for the forbidden fruit and damning all humanity in the years to come.
Think of Samson revealing the secret of his locks to Delilah and his consequent capture by the Philistines.
Think of Draupadi mocking Duryodhana in her palatial abode and thus paving the way for Duryodhana to swear for revenge.

Casino, a movie based on the true story of gangster Frank Rosenthal played by the inimitable De Niro, is another classic example of how a man did everything for and yet was betrayed by the love of his life. In Frederico Garcia Larco’s popular play , Blood Wedding , the bride runs away with her childhood sweetheart on the day of her wedding. Her childhood sweetheart and the groom kill each other in the end. One wouldn’t have imagined that Macbeth would murder Duncan if it were not the Lady’s instigation. Everything came to dust. What was the bloody need for Paris to steal Helen and give way to the most important war waged in Greek mythology. Two fantastic warriors, Hector and Achilles were lost in the fight for a woman. To be precise, somebody else's woman.

Whether you like it or not, plays, books and movies are based on societal influences and observations by writers and directors. It’s not as if Shakespeare suddenly got a brainwave to script a character like Lady Macbeth. Shakespeare and his ilk draw from characters they’ve seen around in their society. More often than not, your favorite movie turns out to be something that you relate to. If playwrights long back could identify characters like that, they must’ve stemmed from real characters like Larco’s bride or Lady Macbeth in the society. For the record , the phrase Femme Fatale originated in 1912.

Hell, even Shane Warne could’ve played the 2003 World Cup if it were not for his mother giving him pills to look good. That’s probably stretching it a bit but my point is that when it comes to women , I think a lot of us men stop seeing reason.

What gets me to write on this topic is an advice I’ve been giving a friend to let go off a girl he’s been clinging on to. Irrespective of any advice that I can give him to part ways, he’s been hoping against hope that things will work out. And I can see why. I think women have this innate quality to get men to do a lot of things that they otherwise wouldn’t. A smile here, a nod there , a wink here , a nudge at the back, any little goddamn thing will make men go weak in their brains to begin with, followed by the knees and God knows where else. Try as I might, I can’t get this friend to forget his lady and after a point one has to just leave it at that.

And just at the point when I’m about to curse this friend of mine for not being able to see reason or logic, I’m reminded of Al Pacino’s immortal line in Scent of a Woman:

Women. What could you say? Who made 'em? God must've been a fucking genius. Hair. They say , hair's everything you know. Have you ever buried your nose in a mountain of curls and just wanted to go to sleep forever? Or lips. And when they touched yours were like that first swallow of wine after you just crossed the desert…”

And I smile and tell G, “It’s alright. Go for her… What can I say?”

Maybe when Neil Diamond paid US$ 150,000,000 as divorce settlement for his wife Marcia Murphey and remarked “She was worth every penny”, maybe , he let the curls and the lips get the better of him, his reason and his money.

Just like all men before and after him and how can we blame him for that?

Monday, April 16, 2007

Funky Chicken Jig!

Way better than the Brett Lee leap or the Shoaib Akhtar bird flap motion or Sreesanth's mid pitch dance!

Hail Langford-Smith! :-D

P.S. : Some pesky browser issues have prevented me from blogging from work. Am on my way to getting a broadband connection at home.

Next post around the corner about the scourge of women, in less than a week's time.

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Professional Exigencies

One fine day:

Super Boss: Hi Issac. There’s this interesting new project I want to involve you with. It’s going to be very exciting. It could probably be the best learning you’ve had thus far in HT. It’s blah blah blah blah…. Let me know what you think of it.

Me: Umm…Well… Err… Actually I don’t think I’m the right guy for this. I mean, I don’t think this interests me enough.

Super Boss: Oh ok. Good day

Me: Good day…

Another fine day:

Super Boss: I think you should do a stint in this new department. It’s going to be very unique and challenging and will give you an insight into this aspect of business.

Me: Umm…Well…Err… I don’t think I’m keen to do this. But…

Super Boss: Ah… it’s ok. Good day.

Me: Good day.

Another, another fine day, in office:

Friend: You wanna play on the terrace?

Me: Oh yeah, but didn’t we lose the football we last used?

Friend: I got a new one today.

Me: Let’s go…


So we went playing on the terrace. I was leading 9-5 in the game and the football fell off the terrace.

On my super boss’s head.

Monday, April 2, 2007

:-(

WI lose three in a row...

Thursday, March 29, 2007

The Undeniable

The lull after India got kicked out of the World Cup...

I am not of those die-hards who wanted India to win it. I'd rather see one of West Indies, South Africa or England pull off this one. Yet I cant deny the void that's looming around after the disaster against SL...

Sunday, March 25, 2007

At Bermuda again!

Little did I imagine , when I wrote a post supporting Bermuda a week before the WC took off, that midway through, a billion people will be cheering for this nation!

The event also went in line with my previous post of "Multiplicity...".

On a serious note with both India and Pak out, hope to see less of ads cutting through the commentary along with less of match- fixing, doping, chucking and tampering in the remaining days of the World Cup! And hopefully , no more murders...

Maybe both India and Pakistan getting out was a toast to Cricket!

Join in! Cheers! :-)

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Multiplicity of an Indian Cricket Fan

The fate of an Indian fan is entwined with the fortunes of other teams. Invariably.

In tri-nation tournaments,we've seen this often becos we would win only one match and then hope that the most dominant team beats the second most dominant team by a huge margin and then we'll eventually go through to the finals thanks to Net Run-Rate or a washout or some stroke of luck, like a Virender Sehwag century.

It's allright in these small tourneys , I'm sure we can cheer for a third team to win or lose but right now we're on an ICC World Cup and we don't know if we'll qualify to be one of the best 8 ODI teams out a game that's played by 10 test playing nations to begin with.

For a start, if I'm a genuine Indian fan today, I'll cheer for Bangladesh. I cry hoarse for them to win it, run like tigers, take wickets, celebrate like chimps , take catches like dolphins and basically beat the sh*t out of Sri Lanka while I eat Hilsa ( I hate it but I'll do it) and sing the Bangla national anthem.

On Friday, I'll obviously cheer for India.

And today if Bangladesh doesn't beat SL, then on Friday I'll become a Bermudan. I'll shout on top of my voices for Leverock and company. I'll want them to beat the sh*t out of Bangladesh. I'll change my identity and scream "Hail Bermuda" with a passion equal to that of Mogambo's sidekick.

I'll do it but even in this age of globalisation, wouldn't transmogrifying 3 national identities, in a space of 4 days, have been quite an ask for Calvin too ?